I never use this page for anything personal, but I am going through a lot that I need to get out and I thought this would be the perfect time and place for me to do it. Welcome to my journey and the struggles I face every single day.
To the family who doesn't want me,
From the first day I laid eyes on him, I knew I was in love with your son. By day two or three, I had made up my mind that I wanted to marry him. At first, none of you had anything to say, just judging me like you always do with those eyes. That look of disgust at someone you didn't even know, should have turned me off, but my love for your son was more important.
Once I was told that "she" couldn't wait for me to die and you all took her side, I started to realize that life was going to be hell until the day I die. A lot has happened since them, I am in more pain then ever and my overall health is worse. If you had ever taken the time to get to know me, you would know that. After 8 years though, I know that is a lost cause.
It is so easy to put everything on me. To blame me for problems that are out of my control. I can take that, I mean who really cares. Use me as your chopping block for everything you choose. But if you are going to do that, have the compassion to come to me with it, not the whole family.
Many things have happened and I have never forgotten any of them and I never will. You tried to ruin our wedding from the get go, telling the whole family that it wasn't going to happen so don't show up. 1 table out of 20-30 was your family. One table..and then you sit there and make comments about the wedding as my family walks by and can hear you. I thought maybe you would grow up that day and accept me, but no you were still trying to cause problems all throughout our special day.
Any time we are about to better ourselves, you decide to ruin it. Most recently, with the trailer. We had a home, it needed work but it was our home and we were learning to love it. No, that isn't true, I already love it, Jay was learning to. Then you stick your nose into it and make us lose the trailer, creating the domino effect that has brought us to the current situation.
To blame me and accuse me of faking all of my illnesses, just to use him and not have to work, is going way too far. In 8 years, you have spent maybe 10 hours with me and that is over the whole course of the 8 years, yet you think you know me well enough to comment?? Everyone in your family (3-4 people) who have actually given me a chance and spent time with me, loves me. So what is your problem???
No, I don't text you or try and talk to you and I think your own actions should tell you why. maybe try and get to know me and I am telling you, you will love me. I am not going to kiss your butts though, what your daughter did is beyond words and I will never forgive her, so I am sure our relationship will remain the same until I or you die and then finally I can live my life without worrying about someone spreading lies and trying to bring me down.
I lvoe your son more than anything in the world and I will fight for us forever. Maybe someday you can grow up and get over the petty stuff and actually see that we are in love and always will be. I tried to write this with the most respect I can muster, even though you refuse to give me any. I am done with this and I hope you can move past it as well, as nothing will change.
Have the day you would wish upon me!
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